Developing the Desire to Change Behavior

In trying to change undesirable behavior patterns, it often helps to break down this task into three components:

• The desire and decision to change.

• The transition from one kind of behavior to another.

• Maintaining the desired behavior; preventing relapse.

These three variables are obviously related. However, for some individuals, viewing them separately can help in kicking a habit or addiction.

In today’s column I will focus on the first of these components. Developing the proper mind set for terminating an undesirable behavior can greatly increase the likelihood of success.

The decision to change needs to evolve into a strong commitment, especially when the undesirable behavior is one that involves chemical addiction, such as smoking.

Often when people decide to change a behavior, they make a half-hearted pledge to do something different. A more detailed appraisal of their commitment however, reveals they simply want to give the change “a try.”

The internal language they use often contains statements indicating some doubt about their belief and the need to change.

A person attempting to stop smoking recently told me, “I guess I need to stop but I don’t really want to.” Another would-be quitter said, “My job involves a lot of stress and I don’t know whether I should try to quit smoking right now or not.”

These hedges and excuses for relapse should be avoided by using the following techniques:

• Set aside some time, free from distraction and interruption, to focus on the desire and commitment to change. Close your eyes and mentally picture yourself free from the undesirable behavior.

Imagine the feelings of satisfaction that will be derived from cessation of the undesirable habit. Mentally refute any reason from hedging, conditions for breaking your commitment to change or perceived weaknesses that might make you resume the undesirable habit.

Repeat this procedure as often as necessary to assist you in your efforts to change. This mental rehearsal and self-directed reinforcement to commitment can help greatly in the early stages of change. This technique can also help you guard against relapse.

• Write down all the reasons that make the change desirable. Look it over frequently, especially during the initial stages of habit/addiction cessation.

• Use self-control techniques if your willpower starts wavering. Attention shifting involves repeating a set of instructions. For example, “I can overcome the craving I feel at this moment by thinking about something else of engaging in a different activity.” This simple procedure can be of great assistance, particularly in the early stages of change.

• Tell friends, relative and co-workers of your intent to change. This can help some people by simply making them afraid to “lose face” by breaking their resolve.

Harold H. LeCrone, Jr., Ph.D. Copyright © 1992