The Reclusive Person

Dear Dr. LeCrone:

My adult niece has lived at home with her mother, who is my sister, all of her life. She rarely leaves the house, even for a check up with a doctor. Although she has finished high school and college, she has never had a job, even at home, and is totally supported by my sister.

My two brothers, and other family members, suspect that a large part of my niece’s reclusiveness stems from my sisters desire to keep her daughter at home. My sister has always been a loner, too, and my family and I don’t believe that she really wants to change the current situation.

Is reclusiveness a form of mental illness? What can I do to help my sister and niece?

-A reader in California

Dear Reader:

There can be many explanations for a person being reclusive. Howard Hughes, Marlon Brando, Emily Dickenson and Charles Lindbergh are but a few famous people that biographers have reported were recluses.

Reclusive people may be extremely shy and introverted and prefer lifestyles spent away from other people, especially people they do not know well. Various mental disorders, including avoidant and schizoid personality disorders, are characterized by reclusiveness. Other psychological problems, such as agoraphobia, social anxiety and obsessive compulsive disorder lead to reclusiveness. People with Asperger syndrome, an autism spectrum disorder, may also be reclusive.

Celebrities may seek solitude and be perceived by other people as reclusive. A misanthrope who dislikes and distrusts other people may be reclusive. There are also those who become reclusive for religious reasons and criminals who avoid the public for fear of being arrested.

The situation you describe with your sister and niece can stem from many causes, and neither she, nor her daughter, may have insight into what sounds like a possible problem. At some point in life, when your sister is unable to stay with her daughter, more problems may arise for your niece.

Your niece’s condition can possibly be helped with professional assistance, but the longer this situation persists, the more difficult it may become to help your niece.

Consider an intervention in which concerned and informed family members, in a group, talk to your sister and explain the need for assistance.

I wish you success with your challenge.