Out-of-control spending can be reined in

Dear Dr. LeCrone: I have a problem that I feel may be psychological. I have a chronic problem with finances and believe I have discovered a pattern to my problem. My financial difficulties arise because of overspending.

The overspending seems to come in cycles or patterns, coming and going in relation to the highs and lows that I experience emotionally. If I am excited, elated, overjoyed, I go on a shopping spree to reward myself. Unfortunately, when I am low, dejected, feel insecure and unhappy, I also exceed my budget and overspend to help me feel better.

I seem to be caught in a trap. I splurge when I am happy and blow it when I am down in the dumps. Do you have any suggestions as to what might be happening and how I can help myself?

Dear Reader: First let me compliment you on your insight into a potentially destructive pattern of behavior that can wreak havoc on you and those you love. Unfortunately, the financial debacle you describe is all too common in our society and sorting out the cause of the difficulty is complex and varied.

Compulsive spending, along with other compulsive behaviors, is often an attempt to deal with anxiety, frustration and unhappiness. They key to understanding the situation is the word “compulsive.”

Some individuals overspend because of bad habits, unobservant patterns of behaviors in their lives or simply a difficulty in prioritizing their financial affairs. Compulsive spending, however, involves the seeming inability to control one’s expenditures. People frequently tell me, “I think and feel that I can control my spending, but the reality of the situation is that I don’t.”

Compulsive spending is frequently seen in individuals who live in highly stressful environments or whose lifestyles include a great deal of tension or unresolved conflict. The compulsive spending is often an attempted “escape” from this unhappiness akin to the escape sought from alcohol or drug abuse, gambling, overeating or other destructive, compulsive behaviors.

These individuals may be victims of depression, stress, low self-esteem and/or unresolved problems from an earlier time in their lives.

Compulsive spenders should ask themselves the following:

Do I feel “high,” exhilarated or relived after a spending spree?
Do I stop to cheer myself up or calm myself down?
Do I buy things I don’t need just because they are on sale?
Do I have items in my closet with price tags still attached?
Do I hide bills or credit card receipts from my spouse or sneak items into the house?
Am I honest with myself about my financial matters, including indebtedness?

If you answered “yes” to several of these questions, then you may want to look more closely at your attitude toward money and spending.

Compulsive spending can be a great cause of stress, but it can be treated and improved upon with professional assistance.

Copyright c 1997 Harold H. LeCrone, Jr., Ph.D.