Psychological abuse can scar souls

Last week, I began a discussion of child abuse and neglect, focusing on signs of physical abuse, those children who are most likely to be abused and characteristics of the abused child’s family.

Today I would like to continue this topic by discussing symptoms of neglect and psychological abuse. Psychological or emotional abuse has been described as the systematic diminishment of another over time. It can be active, “you’re worthless and stupid” or passive, a callous, cold detachment which is the emotional equivalent of physical neglect. Physical abuse scars the body and emotional abuse scars the heart and soul.

The following is a partial list of indicators which often indicate neglect and/or psychological child abuse:

• Poor attendance in school or dropping out.
• Lack of proper nourishment and/or medical attention.
• A “failure to thrive” syndrome in the child with abnormally low height/weight patterns, chronic fatigue and listlessness.
• Dirty, tattered or inappropriate clothing.
• Poor personal hygiene such as body odor, dirty skin and nails and hair, etc.
• Regressive, child like behaviors such as thumb sucking, rocking back and forth, nail biting, need for security blanket or stuffed animals after early childhood.
• Self-destructive behaviors, extreme and frequent risk taking behaviors, antisocial acting out behaviors, and destructive behaviors toward others or their property.
• Extreme passivity and withdrawal or frequent agitation and hyperactive behavior.
• Exaggerated “startle response” with minor provocation.

Any pattern of the above signs and symptoms exhibited over time may be indicators of need for further professional assessment in order to rule out neglect and/or psychological abuse.

Children who suffer from neglect and psychological abuse often exhibit feelings of worthlessness and inadequacy, negative feelings about themselves with low self-esteem, difficulty in establishing and maintaining relationships with peers and poor perception of their own social skills. These same children are often not willing to become involved in school activities because of feelings of being embarrassed and ashamed. They may at times, however, crave the attention of others and be so excessive in their demands that they are perceived as burdensome and “excessively needy”. Many psychologically abused children harbor a life long, insatiable need for approval and frequently have difficulty in establishing and maintaining intimacy in adult relationships.

Their school performance and social development often suffer and they move into an “outcast” position among their peers. All of this reinforces the neglected and abused child’s perception of being different, unworthy, and unwanted. A vicious cycle develops resulting in increased negative self-perception, more distance and detachment and increased probability of more severe psychological problems including depression, anxiety and antisocial behavior if the problems aren’t corrected.

The first step in attempting to correct these unhealthy situations is identification which is often accomplished through the help of teachers, school counselors, mental health professionals, physicians, clergy persons and family members outside the immediate family.

In next week column I will discuss the tragedy of child sexual abuse.

Harold H. LeCrone, Jr., Ph.D. Copyright 1999