Daily courtesies are a benefit to everyone

For many mental health professionals, including myself, observing human behavior is both a vocation and an avocation.

The observation may include the following questions:

• Why do people behave in certain ways?
• Are they aware of the effect of this behavior on themselves and others?
• Would they be willing to change this behavior if it would benefit them or other people?

Let me give several examples where I have observed problems with etiquette.

As part of my own exercise program, I swim laps in an indoor lap pool. The lanes for swimmers are clearly marked with tile at the bottom of the pool so that lap swimmers can avoid running in to each other, thus avoiding possible injury. Regular lap swimmers pick a lane to swim in and usually assume that any other swimmers will observe proper etiquette and use another lane. It is very rewarding to encounter other pool users who observe proper lap pool etiquette that makes the environment safer and more pleasurable for everyone.

Another example occurs when my wife and I walk on a hike and bike trail near our home. There is a mixture of hikers and bikers on the trail and proper etiquette for bikers approaching hikers from behind is to signal their intent to pass on the hikers left side by saying, in a loud enough voice to be heard, “on your left”. This prevents the hikers from inadvertently stepping to their left and possibly being struck by the passing bicyclist. Having walked on many hike and bike trails around the country, I know that this form of courtesy and etiquette is practiced by those bicyclists who consider the safety of slower bikers or those on foot.

My final example comes from the game of golf where proper etiquette dictates that if the golfer’s golf ball makes a ball mark on the putting green, the golfer immediately repairs the indentation. The process takes but a few seconds and makes it possible for golfers that follow to have a smoother, flatter surface on which to putt. It is considered poor etiquette in golf to not repair ones ball marks.

Why do some people practice poor and improper etiquette as in the above mentioned situations?

• Lack of knowledge about etiquette in a particular situation is certainly a possibility. Fortunately, most people seem to begin practicing proper etiquette after these courtesies are called to their attention.
• Preoccupation or forgetfulness could also account for some situations where improper etiquette is displayed.
• Still another possibility is related to the way individuals view rules, etiquette and courtesies. Some individuals don’t feel that rules apply to them and adhere to their own code of ethics which may detract from the safety and enjoyment of others.

Hats off to the individuals who practice and teach their children proper etiquette. It adds to the quality of life for those around them and makes all forms of exercise more effective and fun.

Harold H. LeCrone, Jr., Ph.D. Copyright 2001