Day celebrates many types of love

Will you be my Valentine?

This question is asked today, Valentine’s Day, by both adults and children as they participate in the tradition of exchanging hearts, flowers, candy, and perhaps e-mail greetings. Let’s look at the different ways that our society celebrates this special occasion.

We may start with children as they exchange paper hearts representing their friendship for each other and observe the day at school with decorations. Moving toward adolescence, an awakening of interest in the opposite sex occurs and is often referred to as “puppy love”.
Valentine’s Day then becomes especially significant for sweethearts.
And adults often exchange symbols of love and affection for other adult and children.

As we can see, love has more than one level of meaning and expression. To use the word love to express care, concern, compassion, and deep friendship for each other may send a message which is intense, committed, and rewarding. A deep friendship between people is often described as mutual love.

Parents have a deep and abiding love for their children: children bond with love for their parents. And the highest form of love is the love between a person and his or her God.

The word applies appropriately to all of these situations, but a different and unique set of feelings exist when two people are “in love.” Filled with romance and passion, being “in love” is not found in any other relationship. I have seen this kind of love exist between newlyweds as well as those who have been married for over 50 years.

Being “in love” does not imply that the relationship is free of problems that disagreements do not exist, nor that crises will not occur. Being in love means:

We want to be together in a long term relationship much more than we want to be apart. We are best friends as well as lovers.
We both know that there is a willingness and commitment to overcome any and all obstacles which may emerge and threaten our relationship.
We work to make our love and our commitment to each other come before all others, including our family members, and before our work and leisure.
If we ever feel that we are falling out of love, we will search for a spark sufficient enough to restart the flame.
We have never stopped saying I love you.

Here’s wishing you and your valentine a Happy Valentine’s Day.

Harold H. LeCrone, Jr., Ph.D. Copyright 1999