Recovery requires understanding relapse

You have decided to change – again.

You tell yourself: this time it’s going to be different, and you feel like you really mean it this time. Then again you realize that you have felt that way before.

You’ve told yourself, or been told by others, that if you really wanted to change badly enough you could. But since you didn’t does this mean that you are weak, dumb or insecure?

Individuals struggling with alcohol addiction have often told me, “I can stop drinking. I just can’t keep from starting again.”

Recovery and staying in recovery from addictive and compulsive behaviors – such as drug or alcohol abuse, overeating, gambling, smoking and overspending – require an understanding of and commitment to relapse prevention.

Relapse is not an event that suddenly occurs. Instead it is a process, a series of events, leading up to an unhealthy escape from pain and suffering.

Let’s look at some common pitfalls that can lead to relapse:


Fatigue. Motivation, commitment, judgment and decision-making skills are often diluted, impaired or even disbanded in a fatigued state.
Absence of healthy relationships. Loneliness, chronic conflict and power struggles impede the commitment to relapse prevention.
Poor coping mechanisms. This can include the lack of ability to handle everyday type frustrations and anger, excessive concern over details, difficulty in setting personal limits and boundaries (especially the ability to say no), inability to laugh (when humor puts life’s smaller tragedies and misfortunes into perspective).
Lack of ability to see options and choices in life. This can be feelings of helplessness and hopelessness, self-pity and the belief that one’s misfortune is usually the result of bad luck.
Excessive need for control and perfection. Some people don’t know when enough is enough, they need to win every time, all the time and believe that good, better and best are really categories describing two failures and one pass.
Complacency and overconfidence. This includes the following thinking: “Things are going OK now, I can relax a little and put my past behind me. I really don’t need the kind of spiritual or psychological support I once did. I can now handle the occasional return to some of my old addictions.”

Lack of recognition or denying that these pitfalls or other similar problems exist in one’s life often underlies relapse. There is seldom just one warning sign present in the build up toward relapse. Those committed to preventing relapse need to recognize and deal with these risk factors in order for recovery to persist.

Those committed to preventing relapse need to understand that relapse is often a normal part of the recovery process. They also should understand that attention to warning signs can strengthen the recovery process.

Copyright c 1995 Harold H. LeCrone, Jr., Ph.D.