Speak to your children about terrorist attacks

As we all know, on September 11, 2001, a series of terrible disasters struck this nation. Almost every adult and child has been exposed to numerous accounts of the violence on television and in the newspapers and magazines. Today I would like to discuss the psychological impact of trauma such as the September 11th disasters on children.

Any catastrophe, whether natural or manmade, is frightening to both children and adults. It is important for adults to acknowledge the frightening aspects of disasters with children and avoid falsely minimizing or denying the consequences of disasters.

Following are some suggestions for helping parents talk to their children in times of crisis:

• Talk openingly to your children about their feelings and your own feelings. Dispel any unfounded rumors and attempt to help the child focus on factual information.

• Young children, below the age of five or six, often have difficulty in distinguishing fantasy from reality. Television depictions of attacks can be for the young child, as real and frightening to the child as a real life crisis in which they are involved. Emotionally sensitive children are often affected more than other children and they need even more special attention than the less emotionally sensitive child.

• Talk calmly and react in front of the children in an emotionally composed manner. Hysterical outbursts, uncontrolled crying, screaming and yelling, etc. can upset the child at any age and makes situations worse.

• Answer the child’s questions at the level that is age appropriate for them. Younger children need simpler explanations and less detail. Research has shown that after disaster, children are most afraid of the event happening again, injury or death, separation from their family and the possibility that they will be left alone.

• Maintain a “normal” routine. When possible attempt to stick to the family’s normal schedule of dinner, homework, chores, bedtime, etc.

• Spend extra time with children before bedtime in quiet activities such as reading, playing games, etc. Find activities in books that are calming and foster a sense of closeness and security while reinforcing a sense of normalcy.

• Limit your child’s time spent watching television of disastrous events. Children often become fixated on disastrous scenes, watching them over and over, which can promote psychological difficulties at a later time.

• Children who have experienced trauma prior to a disaster such as unresolved grief over death, serious illness or other traumatic incident’s, may be at more risk for experiencing fear and anxiety if a disaster occurs. These children may need special attention and perhaps professional assistance.

• Observe children for signs of anxiety such as increased irritability or lowered frustration tolerance, problems eating or sleeping, and bodily complaints such as headaches and stomach problems. If these symptoms continue for an extended period of time, seek professional help.

Making your child feel safe and loved in a calm and secure environment can lower a lot of the stress after a disaster.

Harold H. LeCrone, Jr., Ph.D. Copyright 2001