Adolescent years a time of major changes
Adolescence is a time of pronounced physical and psychological change. Rapid physical growth occurs, as does maturation of reproductive features, separation and individuation from parents, rebelliousness and anti-social behavior, sarcasm and negativism, strong identification with peers, self-centeredness, sensation seeking behaviors, re-evaluation of previously held values and moral systems. All of these changes are part of the years of adolescence, some to a greater and some to a lesser degree. Parents, especially those rearing their first adolescent, often are bewildered and even panicky. Their response to their children can be inappropriate and unproductive, with the potential for making this potentially difficult time even more difficult. The following are some stress-provoking situations found in the adolescent and the adolescent's family:
• Increased arguments and disagreements erupt between parent and adolescent over duties and responsibilities in the home. Adolescents are often very messy and getting them to keep their room straight and clean is often a difficult task. Their self-centeredness and tendency to challenge parental authority often makes getting them to help around the house a major challenge.
• Adolescents frequently begin to resist being involved in family activities. They frequently act embarrassed or ashamed of their parents, especially in public places. Many parents tend to personalize these situations and have difficulty in accepting this phase of psychological development which passes with maturity.
• An increase in arguments and disagreements over the adolescent's choice of friends and activities normally develops during this time. The adolescent's need to display their individuality often leads to unusual hair style, dress, and language.
• Increased arguments and disagreements over such issues as the use of the family car, the value and relevancy of academic achievement, curfews, and time spent on the telephone with peers.
• Pressures associated with the beginning of junior or senior high school.
• Death or illness of family members, such as grandparents, which often occurs during teenage years.
Knowledgeable and caring parents recognize not only the need to set limits and boundaries but also to impart unconditional love to their children. They tend to reserve their inflexibility for major issues such as drug and alcohol use, pre-marital sexual activity, health related issues, and parental respect.
They recognize that this time in their child's growth and development can be stressful, but they know it can also provide the opportunity to help mold and shape their child's life into that of a happy, healthy and successful young adult. The opportunities and challenges are there for parents who see them as such.
Copyright c 1994 Harold H. LeCrone, Jr., Ph.D.
