How Some Families Survive In Tough Times
Dear Dr. LeCrone:
During the early 1990s my family and I were struggling very hard to keep our heads above water in an economy that was very bad. You wrote a wonderful column, which we saved, that helped us a lot during this time, and it ended with “They are survivors.” Please give your readers this timely information again.
-A reader in Florida.
Dear Reader:
I found the column and was amazed how parallel the problems then and now seem to be. I hope this information is as helpful to people now as it was to you then.
The 1980s were, for many, a time of milk and honey. Jobs were more plentiful, credit was given more freely, economic forecasts were rosy and we seemed to be living on an ever-expanding bubble that would never burst.
For many, things have changed and in some cases the changes are dramatic. I see people struggle to maintain the same lifestyle that they had and the strain is beginning to show in many ways. Many have lost their jobs or have had to take severe wage cuts. Others have lost their homes, their businesses, their dreams and even their health.
What started as downsizing for many has resulted in downward mobility. Anger, frustration, bitterness, stress and depression are rampant. The shift was very sudden for many individuals and families.
Some families survive in spite of the drastic downward changes in the economy.
• They believe that they can and will deal with these transitions and changes. They see relationships as more important than things. Their possessions are far less important to them than the love that they have for each other.
• The initial shock, anger, and disbelief associated with the economic changes are quickly replaced by thoughts and actions associated with survival and adaptation. They spend little time looking back and instead look toward to a new future.
• They depersonalize the events leading up to the necessary changes and abstain from feelings of guilt, fault, blame.
• They maintain a sense of humor. They quickly begin thinking about possibilities of putting psychological distance between themselves and their economic misfortune.
• They maintain healthy eating, sleeping and exercise habits, and carefully avoid unhealthy patterns of escape, such as alcohol or drugs.
• Most have a strong spiritual belief system that they use to help overcome feelings of loss of control.
• They rely heavily on friends and family for support. They talk about their concerns rather than bottling them up inside and becoming isolated.
• They have a strong belief that good things can come from change, and their sense of optimism is very apparent.
In following the lives of many of these individuals, I find that they are most often the first to adapt to the changes. They believe in themselves and their family and are looking to the future for new opportunities and challenges. They are survivors.
