Is it time for marital checkup

When is the last time you assessed the relationship with your spouse? Most marriages can use an occasional "check-up," so, here are some questions that might help you gauge the status of some of the important variables in a healthy marriage.

Instead of answering yes or no to each question, respond with: most of the time, some of the time, or rarely or never.

• I feel that my spouse is committed to me and that I am the most important person in his/her life.

• We generally agree with each other on important things such as values, attitudes, religious beliefs, moral code, etc.

• I feel that my spouse respects me and looks upon our marriage as a "strong partnership."

• I am in agreement with the way we handle our personal finances.

• Our marriage is free from control issues and power struggles.

• I am pleased with the way my spouse relates to our children.

• I am happy with the amount of time we spend talking to each other.

• I trust that my spouse and our marriage are free from deception and lies.

• The friendships we share are pleasing to me.

• I am happy with the way my spouse relates to his/her parents, siblings, and other relatives.

• I am happy with the way my spouse relates to my parents, siblings, and other relatives.

• Our sex life is good.

• My spouse's personal habits and health practices present no problem for me.

• My spouse trusts me and allows me time to develop healthy interests which are sometimes separate from his/hers.

• I believe strongly in the marriage vows that tie us together.

• My spouse believes strongly in the marriage vows that tie us together.

Your responses will give you a rough assessment of your perception of the health of your marriage at this time. Obviously, many "most of the times" is much healthier than many "rarely or nevers."

If you are not married, but think you might be in the future, then use these questions as a way of helping you look at important variables in a healthy marriage.