Is Your Relationship Headed For Trouble?
Do you feel that your relationship is headed for trouble or already there? If so, then you might want to see if you need to make some of the following changes.
First of all, couples should quit taking each other for granted. He/she is not an old shoe to be worn in mud and rain and left on the porch to dry. Shoes and relationships can become brittle, cracked and eventually fall apart without our focused attention and love.
A good test is to ask yourself: Is my spouse or partner the most important person in my life and therefore my first priority?
Quit trying to control the life of your spouse. Your partner is not a pet to be trained to behave in the fashion you deem correct and proper. A healthy relationship is one in which power struggles are absent, where dominant-submissive patterns don’t exist.
Quit trying to read your spouse’s mind. Assuming, guessing or prophesying what your spouse is thinking is like relegating them to the status of a crystal ball and you a fortune teller.
Conversely, don’t expect your spouse to read your mind. Starting your sentence with “I feel,” “I need,” “I hope,” are ways to open a healthy conversation.
Healthy problem solving
Quit trying to make your spouse a verbal (and certainly not a literal) punching bag upon which you can vent your frustrations. If you are unhappy, then you need to learn a healthy method of resolving your problems.
Don’t take things out on the one you are supposed to love the most. Your partner is not a scapegoat.
Quit assuming your significant other has the same sexual thermostat you have. Your sexual needs are not to be thrust upon your partner as though they were simply some mindless, emotionless object designed to satisfy your desires. Openly and honestly discussing how sexual needs can be met is a good place to start.
Quit looking for “things” to happen that will make you happy in your relationship.
A bigger house, a more prestigious job, money, social status and recognition, and even children are not the things necessary for a healthy and happy relationship.
Couples who put each other first, admire and respect one another, consider their partner their best friend and treat them accordingly, and who commit to continually nurturing the relationship are most likely to have a healthy lifelong friendship.
