Stir up surprise for your valentine

Valentine’s Day is just around the corner. Whether that special person in your life is your spouse, boyfriend, girlfriend, or simply someone you want to let know that you care about them, it’s time you thought about a remembrance for them.

My young daughter has been preparing paper valentines for her classmates for the past week and continues the tradition I followed when I was her age, that of taking them to school and giving them to friends.

If you like special occasions, this can be a fun and exciting time as the stores are filled with valentine mementos.

During the last several years I have noted negative commentaries about many holidays. Halloween used to be fun for youngsters, but now parents must be cautious if they allow their children to “trick or treat.” Everything must be checked for harmful objects in the treats. A lot has been written encouraging us to bypass Halloween because it emphasizes witches and goblins. Many feel this evokes fear and negative emotions in children.

Easter has its less-than-enthusiastic supporters who remind us that many of the symbols associated with Easter relate to pagan fertility rites and other less-than-positive images. Even Christmas has its “humbuggers.” But I can’t recall much if any disapproval of Valentine’s Day, with its hearts and flowers and romance.

In fact, many marriage enrichment suggestions or relationship enhancement techniques include looking for unique and unexpected ways to surprise a spouse or friend with something meant to show we care and that the other individual is special to us. This is not meant to replace one of the most important ways of letting someone know you care for them. You should tell them so in a sincere, straightforward and unconditional way. T eh following ideas, however, may help you think of ways of your own to surprise that special person.

Be thoughtful. Mail a special note or bit of poetry to that special person in your life telling them of your feelings for them. Consider mailing it to their work place. Write personal on the envelope so it will be delivered personally and not opened.
Open up. Express your feelings. Make a cassette tape sharing your thoughts, feelings and expressions of love on tape. Request that the receiver of the tape listen to it only when they are alone, perhaps riding to work or at their lunch break.
Be daring. Surprise your spouse by a “kidnapping.” Make arrangements for a baby sitter and hotel or motel reservations. Whisk them away. Only at the last moment confide what the travel itinerary will be and what you have planned.
Be practical and considerate. Write out “gift certificates” for your spouse. Consider one for a week of breakfasts in bed. Volunteer to perform some task they are not fond of doing, like washing the dishes, taking out the trash, washing the car, mowing the grass or any other chore that will display your consideration for them in a tangible way.

Put on your thinking cap. These ideas should make you start thinking and produce something for your valentine that will be a real expression of caring.