Holidays usher in unnecessary stress for many

For many individuals, this is the season for allergies, colds, flu, and seasonal affective disorder (SAD). SAD is a type of depression thought to be caused by shortened days and less exposure to sun light. Another problem affecting many individuals at this time of the year is holiday season stress syndrome, a constellation of psychological difficulties occurring between Thanksgiving and New Year's Day. Let's examine some of the symptoms of holiday season stress syndrome:

• Feeling sad, lonely, or listless

• Feelings of emptiness, constant fatigue, numerous aches and pains, dread

• Withdrawal and self-absorption

• Perceived expectation and striving for perfect holiday season with subsequent frustration, disappointment and anger

• Excessive eating and/or consumption of alcohol

• Tension between gathered family members with long standing differences or divorced parents struggling with each other over their children's holiday schedules

• renewed or magnified grieving over the loss of loved ones triggered by holiday nostalgia and music

Fortunately, there are techniques that can be of assistance in reducing and coping with holiday stress syndrome. Start by making a list of all the things you like about the holiday season (this assumes that there are some positives for you at this time of the year). For example, you may list as positive the time off from work, the opportunity to spend more time with close friends or seldom seen family members, the spiritual and religious aspects of the holiday season. For others, the opportunity to spend more time with hobbies and recreational pursuits, do some traveling, or catch up on projects otherwise postponed. Hopefully you might see this season as an opportunity to help others less fortunate, experience the joy of giving some of your time and talents to a special holiday project, or simply give your children some extra time and attention. Now, take this list of things you like about the holiday season and try to maximize time spent on the things you like.

The next step is to list the negative side, the things you like the least. Add or subtract from those items provided earlier in this column and attempt to minimize or reduce these things. You may want to include the following:

• Deal with grief by recognizing that these important feelings and memories have their place and can be expected, but dealt with at this time. Don't try to deny or repress the need to let grief have a place in your life, but don't let it be the dominant place.

• Set up a budget for gifts and don't let the debt pile up by overspending.

• Strive for balance with food, drink, sleep, and exercise.

• Don't let family gatherings become a forum for discussing old wounds, grievances or unhappy memories.

• Don't attempt to produce a "storybook Christmas." Remember, you can't possibly please everyone or have everything go smoothly, nor can you avoid some occasional friction, frustration, and disappointment.

• Seek the spirit of the season rather than the things of the season. Frequently remind yourself what it is that you want to remember and celebrate rather than what the media hype, Madison Avenue, and sound bytes promote and encourage.

Copyright c 1996 Harold H. LeCrone, Jr., Ph.D.