Take time to enjoy the holidays

The holiday season spreads joy and exhilaration. With carols in the air, tinsel and glitter everywhere, and commercials reminding you to hurry, hurry only a few shopping days left, anticipating is high as many picture a time of renewed family gatherings and gift exchanging.

For many people, however, the holiday blues obliterate all the messages of cheer, and holidays and loving and giving are a time of dread. Most affected are:

The elderly – living alone or without supportive friends or relatives close by. They are forced to spend the days with only nostalgic memories of happier times.

Singles – separated from families and places of origin. They have not formed new friends and acquaintances.

Newly divorced couples or those who have recently experienced a death in the family – they feel a sense of loss and sadness.

Homemakers and breadwinners who have exhausted themselves in making elaborate preparations.

Abused, neglected, forsaken children.

The main causes of holiday stress are:

Unrealistic expectations about gifts – illogical beliefs that the most extravagant means the best.

Breaking or unbalancing the budget and facing the debts that follow.

Excessive festivities or an overcrowded social calendar causing drinking to excess, eating to excess, spending to excess.

Fatigue, which leads to frustration and irritability.

But there are ways to avoid the holiday blues.

If you are alone during the holidays, reach out and find someone to share the time. Visit retirement homes, sanctuary houses for the abused and mistreated; remember the mentally ill.

If you are with family members who cause tension, prepare for it. Avoid topics that stir the tempest, be kind to each other, join hands and appreciate the worth of each one.

If you are on a tight budget place the family names in a hat and draw – no need to buy gifts for everyone on the list. Or, if time permits, make a simple gift for someone, provide a service, a promise of help-giving time in the future.

Holidays are a time for personal reflection, participating in traditions, gathering with those who love and for giving. The best gift may be the one you give yourself – sensible spending, moderate indulgence, rest and a search for the spiritual meaning of sharing. Make your holiday a merry one with careful management of time and budget. By careful management of time and budget, the season should be a merry one.