With Healthy Outlook as Foundation, Woman can Build Better Life

Dear Dr. LeCrone:

I’m a thirty-something female who is employed in a job with a lot of stress, irregular hours and not much pay. Being divorced with two young children gives me little time to socialize, exercise or even fantasize about a healthy lifestyle and happiness. My self-esteem is sub-zero, but because I love my children and know that I have a pretty good mind, I haven’t given up hope for a better future. Where do I start?

-A reader in Virginia

Dear Reader:

Start first by counting your blessings: your children, mind, job and gift of hope.

Add to these four important ingredients a generous portion of optimism, clear thinking, social support and, perhaps, some training and education, and watch your future develop into something brighter.

Your resiliency and ability to overcome obstacles can start a dramatic warm-up in your sub-zero self-esteem. You must believe that giving up and losing hope is not an option for you. The power to control your future can only be limited by your fear of painting dreams.

Don’t be bound by what other people tell you that you can and can’t do. You are the master of your own ship, so get a good grip on the helm, spread your sails and set your course.

Does this mean that there won’t be some big waves and stormy weather in your future? Of course not, but as you become a more accomplished sailor, you will navigate through and around these challenges.

Healthy priorities emerge from healthy perspectives and a lot of persistence. A good support group is often a good place to start, and can include a place of worship, a community mental health clinic, or simply a group of individuals with a common set of goals.

Make your family a team. Give your children duties, chores and responsibilities at home, as this will not only help you, but also will help to build their character.

Learn stress management techniques to help you with you job. My own website, www.haplecrone.com, has many suggestions.

Consider advancing your career opportunities by distance learning , where online classes and correspondence courses can open new job opportunities for you.

Seek social outlets necessary to keep you from isolating yourself from other adults your age.

Don’t expect everything to change overnight, but do believe that good things will happen.